Pray today. Thanks.

PLEASE PRAY FOR CHILE!

http://www.boston.com/bigpicture/2010/02/earthquake_in_chile.html

And don't forget to Pray for Haiti!

And Pray for Hawaii! Apparently a tsunami is on its way.

Actually, just pray for the world.

Pride and Joy

After that venting session I need something to uplift my mood. In order to do so, I've decided to share with you a few bits of information that have made me very proud of my family and friends and given me some joy.

- My baby sister is a G. She went to a math competition a few weeks ago, and was the only person on the middle school team that took the time to show up to the competition. She did ok in the individual competition, and under the influence of our high school math teacher she entered the team competition alone. The superstar 7th grader placed 5th out of 30 teams alone. SHE IS SUCH A BALLER.

- My little sister whom I don't have the best relationship with is also doing big things. Although we attend the same school we don't really talk...but whether she knows it or not, I check up on her. She's doing AMAZING in her classes, doesn't give in to peer pressure and just does her.

- My best friend/sister is loving/living her life. She's in school. She has kept her jobs and been raking in the money.AND she just got a new job. She's kept up her working out as well and looks amazing. She's legit one of my role models.

- My twin has been through so much this year but she still has the most amazing outlook on life. She's excited for the future, enjoying life, forgetting the bs around her, working like crazy (this chick has 3 jobs).

- My tre has found love. Like for real. I'm so happy for her. She's doing things, got these fly internships, in school, and working.

-Crazy Kelis! I love her. Until I met her I didn't know how much someone could really care about their friends. She has the biggest heart out of everyone I know and I'm so proud of how much she's changed and grown since we first met. The way she's handled tough situations that were brought to her this week show just how mature she is.

- No one has anything on my Pair. She's only a junior already working on multiple clients' accounts in an accounting firm, while still in school, while still managing to have time for a life, and being away from her family.

- Lifeline, ma, aunties. Love them. I know I don't call like I should. But I love them all just the same.

- Roomie. There is no other. My Roomie will always be better than yours. She's gonna be a doctor. She took initiative to come to dance rehearsal for a routine she wasn't in just for fun and exercise. I've always wanted to do that but never had the courage.

- Ugie. Chick is about her work. I've never seen anyone study on such a constant basis as this girl!

- Woahdie. Love this girl. She's my fitness role model.

- All my friends that got RA positions I'm SO excited and proud of ya'll too.

- BankRhea came to visit and it made my week seeing her. I miss her and many of the WashU grads.

Ok. Tired of typing. Those are just a few of the things that bring me joy/ have made me happy this week and on a constant basis.

i do not like rips bits liars or disrespectful individuals

Let me preface this post with the fact that Sister Act 2 is on so I'm very happy.

However, I need to get something off my chest. People let you down. With all of my education classes, mentoring training, psychology classes, and RA training I know that people generally expect the worst of people and focus on the negative. As such, I try earnestly to focus on the positive things people do. Even, and especially people I dislike personally because I don't like personal biases to get in the way of work.

HOWEVER.

I have legit encountered a grimy individual. I didn't know these people actually existed. I thought everyone had some good in them. Apparently I was wrong. I haven't liked this rip ever since I became acquainted with her. But, I've constantly pointed out the few good things she's done and tried to focus on them, only to find out she's being lying this whole time with some underhanded sneaky mess. I DON'T LIKE RIPS, BITS, LIARS, AND/OR DISRESPECTFUL INDIVIDUALS.

I'm very upset. But I refuse to waste my life on unimportant individuals. So my unhappy emotions end now.

Got my happy thoughts on the post-its in Baby J and in my wallet.

Happy Thoughts For The Day:
Sam Sam
Strawberry Ice Cream
My mom
Ecuador
Fresh Empanadas
Strawberries and cream

A Problem and A Solution

Problem:
I am freaking out wondering what I'm going to do after college. Yes, I've applied to programs. Yes, I've completed my teachers certification. Yet, I have no decisions. Thinking about life after May 21, 2010 is consuming my mind. Real talk. I think about it at least once every other minute. I've become an insomniac. I've ceased being productive academically or at my jobs. It's a legit issue.

Solution:
Focus on things that calm me down. Today I went to go see Afriky Lolo and I was reminded of my love for dance and music. It's hilarious that I will dance in class, go out with friends, dance in Black Anthology, and when everything ends...believe that I'll be ok. I need some new music..and I need to take some time out of each day to dance, and play or listen to music. Hopefully that'll keep me a little bit centered.

Sincerely,

Ceily Decietful (yeah I'm still here...it'll be awhile til I'm gone)

Random thoughts and things I like...

I'm watching Law and Order.
I love Law and Order.

Whoopi Goldberg is a foster mom on this episode.
I love Whoopi Goldberg.

I'm also currently drinking am amazing smoothing I made.
I love delicious smoothies.

The end.

What Makes a Real Friend?

You know that song... Make new friends, but keep the old, one is silver and the others gold?

When I was little I thought it meant that new friends are better than old friends. Clearly I know now that that is not necessarily true. Later I took it to mean that some friends are better than others, the better ones being the gold. Over the years, I've learned that many of my friends prefer silver over gold (with regards to jewlrey) so I wonder if I was confused about which was best all along.

Recently, I've been struggling a lot with some of my relationships with people who I have considered my friends for the last couple years. In reflecting about it and discussing this issue with the limited people who have been there over the years, I have come to the discovery that I really don't know who is my friend. I've come to the conclusion that I have some very very good people in my life, but I don't know if they all are my friends. This scares and saddens me.

I feel like is a friend is someone who you confide and they confide in you. Most of my relationships are very one sided. I don't know how this happened or how to fix this. In addition, it amazes me how much people who I haven't been close with until fairly recently, will support me, and come to me for support, and of course just to be silly...where those people who I considered myself close with, share information with each other, or people I don't hang out with, but get upset when they don't know what's going on in my life. Or now they act funny because I've ceased being excited when I see them, because...I'm not. Why should I make people feel good, because I'm happy to see them, and they rarely if ever do that for me?

This is not to say, I'm not excited when I see them. But I've decided to work on me, and being happy, and being alert. So why expend energy I could use to better myself on people who don't really value me?

I'm done wasting my time on disrespectful, fairweather, people.

Done.

Little Known Fact About Me

I'm not going to lie...I've recieved some news that not only troubles me, it also pisses me off. So I'm going to let the few of you who take the time to read my blog know a little something about me most people fail to realize.

I'm am that crazy hyper positive person you're used to me being. I am lazy and like to have fun and usually try to avoid conflict at all times. I will also inform you that I'm a mean person on the inside and you'll crack up at my inappropriate criticisisms of others and sarcastic responses to unknowing acquaitances. However, rarely am I mean FOR REAL.

But if you push me to that limit...

IT WILL NOT BE PRETTY.

Currently...I'm at the edge of that precipice looking over...imagining all the damage I could do if I felt the urdge and desired the energy rush of taking that free fall. So be forewarned...

Those of you who remember the days when I used to hang with the Dragons at Dan McCarty...

Jay J, that mfjbd is about to make an appearance.

You've been warned.

Lent.

I give up my vices, to sacrifice for HIM. Got to focus on what's important.

Happy Ash Wednesday

For me:
No more potatoes
No more swearing

I should probably give something else up...I just can't think of anything good. We'll see.

Ode to Sleep Deprivation

I am currently sleep deprived. That is a fact. I know it...and it shows. I have not been on the top of my game, physically, mentally or emotionally. So, being the RA that I am I went to http://shs.wustl.edu/healthPromotion/sleep.htm to brush up on my knowledge of sleep and its importance. I thought I'd share. So here it is:


Sleep
Getting enough sleep not only contributes to how you feel and perform the next day, but also has a huge impact on the overall quality of your life. Sacrificing sleep means you are sacrificing your chance to live up to your fullest academic and creative potential.

What is sleep?
There is a lot going on in your body and your brain when you sleep. A typical night’s sleep occurs in 90 minute cycles of REM (rapid eye movement) sleep and non-REM sleep. Your pulse, breathing, and body temperature rise and fall during these cycles. Brain-waves are active during REM sleep and researchers believe that the brain takes care of important tasks involving learning and memory during this time.

Why is sleep so important?
Sleep is essential for good health, mental and emotional functioning, and safety. Research indicates that sleep loss impairs your ability to perform tasks involving memory, learning, and logical reasoning, which may contribute to unfulfilled potential at school and strained relationships. Insufficient sleep can also be extremely dangerous, leading to serious or even fatal accidents.

It should take you fewer than 30 minutes to fall asleep. Symptoms of insomnia include difficulty falling asleep, frequent awakenings, waking up too early and not being able to fall back asleep, and waking up feeling unrefreshed. Stress is the most common cause of insomnia.

How much sleep do you need?
Getting enough sleep refers to the amount of sleep you need to not feel sleepy the next day. Sleep experts generally recommend an average of 7-9 hours per night. If sleepiness interferes with or makes it difficult to do your daily activities, you probably need more sleep.
Sleep need is biological. Exactly how much sleep any individual needs is genetically determined. How can you determine what you need? Sleep until you wake on your own, without an alarm clock. If you feel rested, that is your sleep need.

If you’ve been having sleep problems for more than one week or if sleepiness interferes with the way you feel or function during the day, a doctor's help may be needed.

What about medications?
Over the counter (OTC) medications: You should discuss ANY sleep aid you are planning to take with your doctor. OTC sleep medicines usually contain antihistamines which may induce drowsiness that lasts into the next day. They can also interact with other medicines you may be taking.
Prescription medications: Your doctor may prescribe sleeping pills or tranquilizers for short term use under certain conditions, such as after the death of a loved one or other serious emotional trauma. However, risk of side effects and addiction are a concern with extended use of these medications. If you need long-term help in sleeping, talk to your doctor about other options.
Stimulants: The use of stimulants to stay awake is risky. Raised blood pressure, anxiety, dizziness, aggressive behavior, and irregular or rapid heart beat can result as a consequence. Using Adderall, Ritalin or other prescription stimulants for any reason other than their intended purpose, by someone other than the intended recipient, or in a dosage other than prescribed is dangerous. The possibility of drug interactions, rapid onset, and increased potency, make the misuse of stimulants highly dangerous.
Alcohol: Alcohol seems to accelerate falling asleep. However, it also disrupts normal sleep patterns and suppresses REM sleep, even when alcohol has been eliminated. Alcohol also makes it difficult to awaken, even if consumed in moderate amounts.
How can you take care of yourself?
Follow these tips for getting a good night’s sleep:

Be bland before bed. To fall asleep quickly, avoid caffeine, nicotine and alcohol in the evening.
Be predictable. Go to bed as close to the same time each night as possible, and build into your schedule enough time for 8 hours of sleep each night.
Establish a routine. Establishing a regular, relaxing bedtime routine will allow you to unwind and send a "signal" to your brain that it's time to sleep.
Notes on naps. If you anticipate a night with little sleep, take a nap beforehand to avoid sleep loss. But if you suffer from imsomnia, consider avoiding naps altogether.
Exercise regularly. And do so at least three hours before bed time.
Reduce stress. If you lie awake worrying about things you need to do, try “putting them away” by writing them down in a journal so you are free to sleep.
Save your bed for sleep. Avoid using your bed for anything other than sleep or sex.
Check your sleep environment. Make it as pleasant, comfortable, and quiet as you can. Most people sleep best in a cool, dark environment.
Keep your alarm clock out of sight. Do not “check the time” if you wake in the middle of the night. This often creates arousal and makes it more difficult to fall back asleep.
Grab a light snack. It can be hard to fall asleep if you’re hungry.
Never drive when you are tired. If you’re feeling tired while driving, pull off the road in a safe rest area and take a nap for 15-45 minutes. The best prevention for drowsy driving is a good night's sleep the night before your trip.
Where can you go for help?
Campus Experts
Student Health Services, 314.935.6666. For chronic sleep problems, you may want to consult with a psychiatrist for a medication evaluation.
On-Line Resources
National Sleep Foundation

Power Sleep

Harvard Division of Sleep Medicine
Where can you learn more?
Professional
Health Promotion Services, provides brochures and other resources. To request a sleep program, email Melissa Ruwitch, or call314.935.7139
Peer
Uncle Joe’s Peer Counseling and Resource Center, 314.935.5141. Call to request a program on sleep.

Workout! (to the tune of Freakout!)

I've been struggling a lot keeping up with my workouts. Going to the gym on a regular basis does not work well for me I need to discover some in home exercises that I can do every day and just make it routine. The next couple posts will be dedicated to in home...or in class (probably won't help me focus) workouts I can do. And maybe some healthy eating tips. I figure if I focus on researching it, it'll stay on my mind. I will succeed.

My Babies

There are those girls who spend their lives planning their future weddings. I am not one of those. However, I do spend my time idly doing something equally ridiculous... creating lists of the names of my future children.

Fun fact about me: I look forward to being a mom just as much as I look forward to finding my soulmate...actually probably more.

The problem is I often times loose this list. So...I've decided I'm going to keep it on here:

Chicas:

Aethera
Jyessenia
Jessielynne
Lela

Chicos:

Achebe
Azra

Is there a fifth element?

So the movie "The 5th Element" has always been entertaining and interesting to me. I'm currently watching it with my best friends from school and I started to wonder...Is there a real 5th element?



The original 4 terrestrial elements are: fire, earth, wind, and water... that is commonly known information. Growing up in the 90s we all learned about the other element of Heart thanks to Captain Planet and Ma-Ti (who consequently I have called Ha-ji my whole life until just now looking up the Planateers names on Wikipedia).





After watching the 5th element I could consider Love the 5th element... as there is no reason for life without love.

When you google the 5th element it also suggests the 5th element on the periodic table, Aether from Greek mythology meaning heavenly light or that which fills up the space of the universe, or according to Aristotle it's quintessence

So what is it?

Forever, forever, you'll stay in my heart

So my friends and I were talking about about boys and relationships with one of their moms. It is February so these types of conversations all though typical of us...have been happening a lot more frequently. We discussed the following questions:

Would we approach a guy if we liked him?
Why wouldn't we...are we afraid of rejection or just shy around guys?

Being that we are all Christian we all believe in the word of the Lord and the bible says in Proverbs 18:22 "Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the LORD." I want so much to find love and that man who will be my best friend, lover, and companion... but I'm not going to lie, I want him to be the pursuer. Yes, I know that's sexist and old fashioned as well but it's what I want.

However, we realized and discussed: Why should a man/boy/guy work to find a woman when the easiness of a large percentage of girls emanates from their person which the male species picks up on? Guys know their will always be some floozy around the corner so why pursue someone?

I honestly have no idea why a guy would want to go through all that work...but I want him to.
I'm watching My Best Friends Wedding with Chellikins and it's making me really sad.

I await the day when I can sing song about someone I know.

The moment I wake up
Before I put on my makeup
I say a little prayer for you
While combing my hair, now,
And wondering what dress to wear, now,
I say a little prayer for you

Forever, forever, you'll stay in my heart
and I will love you
Forever, forever, we never will part
Oh, how I'll love you
Together, together, that's how it must be
To live without you
Would only be heartbreak for me.

I run for the bus, dear,
While riding I think of us, dear,
I say a little prayer for you.
At work I just take time
And all through my coffee break-time,
I say a little prayer for you.

Forever, forever, you'll stay in my heart
and I will love you
Forever, forever we never will part
Oh, how I'll love you
Together, together, that's how it must be
To live without you
Would only be heartbreak for me.

My darling believe me,
For me there is no one
But you.

Friday

Mardi Gras is in interesting concept.

People fight for beads...why?

2:11 am thoughts on 2/11

Individualism is really important to me. Talking with friends and students about their backgrounds and experiences has always interested me. I love learning about others and sharing about myself. I think a true testament to a friendship is really understanding your own identity or striving to do so...while at the same time learning about friends identities and encouraging them to continue their self discovering and self-discovery.

This is my last semester of senior year. It's a celebration...but it's also about discovery. I've already had so many new experiences in the last year and I'm looking forward to so many more.

I was already determined to know more about my own family heritage starting this year, but one of my friends determination and success at bettering her self has inspired me to really work on knowing myself, and working on me this year.

It might sound selfish, but it's necessary.
So watch out world.
Here goes nothing.

Mardi Gras on my Mind

tick tock when the clock

Time for another post:

Thoughts at 9:56pm in Cornerstone

#1 Secret Life is a good show. Which is why I'm catching up on it now.
#2 I have a great play family. I love them. I tell people we're actually related.
#3 Valentines day is weird. People that love each other should know that and tell each other that on the regular.
#4 Yea. Sometimes I...forget what I'm doing. Hence why it is now 10:17
#5 Love Lifeline.

Pensamientos del momento

#1 IHOP all you can eat pancakes. Excited about going there with the grandbaby and the rest of 09



#2 I'm still hungry

#3 I really need to be productive while I'm at work. About to get cracking on Autobiografía de un esclavo.

#4 I really wish I knew all the words in this text so I didn't have to look up some of them. Reading my Spanish homework always takes so long.

#5 Pearls are that deal. Real talk.

thoughts on my mind 9:17pm feb. 10 2010

I've decided that until I catch up on blog posts, I will post the first 5 thoughts on my mind every 15 minutes for as many days as possible, for as long as I remember. I will have 365 blog posts at the end of the year. Believe that.

#1 i'm hungry.
#2 "paris we do it proper"
#3 happy thoughts on my mind...must keep calm
#4 i really love the theory of cognitive dissonance...like for real.
#5 always ride or die